the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
