I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Randomize
