We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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