I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I could make wine with my vomit
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Randomize
