is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Randomize
