I cockslap morals
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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