I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I just forgot I was standing up.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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