try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
