i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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