Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
