Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
