dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
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