It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
You pole danced in your parka.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Randomize
