Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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