Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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