Please, let me fuck your mom
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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