All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Randomize
