I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize