Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Randomize
