I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
