Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Randomize
