hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
I need a burrito and a hug.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
This is classic penis vs brain.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
