No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
