we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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