yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
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