I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
