I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
