i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
