Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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