i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize