I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Randomize
