I think scott just propositioned me for sex
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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