We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
