it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Randomize
