Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
