brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
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