Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize