Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
only if we run a train.
done.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Randomize
