fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Randomize
