hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Randomize
