And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
