Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
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