Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
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