Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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