This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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