i jhust puked up my retainher.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
