Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
