He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
operation harelip BJ is a go
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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