Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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