never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
