He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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