with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize
